Cheat no more

I can cheat no more now So far no good or no bad, any how Now I am on last leg of journey Yet I haven’t found the final key I look back peacefully for honest answer I have probed mind several times but got no where It is bothering me from inner depth of conscience I search for it but get no clue even by chance Life has passed off like thunder storm Many up and down still useful and warm Life was very much enterprising and promising I took right steps yet something went on missing Now I have enough of time to think about past misdeeds But what is use when enough of damage was done with greed What have I not done to alienate the relatives and close people? Most undeserving act on my part for fermenting the troubles “Everything is fair in war and love” was followed with quite zeal Eve though it was false pretext and far from real I had lot more in store to hide or conceal As I was blinded by glitter and went on to make the deals I have amassed enough of wealth to last for generations I take pride in having it but internally end up with suffocation I know the method by which it was accumulated I regret it now as it is not worth even to be related It pinches me hard and destroys the inner conscious core I should not have pursued or gone zealously any more These are all crocodile tears and I have fully understood So it hurts me more as it has provided me no good I think of uneasiness and discomforts that has been inherited Long nights are troubling for reasons not even merited It is my own doing and bothers me in this stage People may pardon with fine gesture as I have reached an old age Life must be lived on nicely even if it is very hard to sustain It makes you hard to carry on and maintain Makes you stubborn not to loose the sight of goal Rest everything can be put at rest by responding to the call River waters are also settled after initial stage of naughtiness It is taken lightly with no offence as considered to be passing phase It is said that you deserve to be pardoned if lamented honestly Life is really rewarded if it is followed earnestly and aptly