S. Note (Poem), by YourEyesMyWords Subscribe to rss feed for YourEyesMyWords

Dear Reader,
This is only so hard to say,
On what had happened yesterday.
I felt as if my life had stopped,
And my heart just got stomped.

I do not wish to say goodbye,
Yet I have nothing else to say.
But the pain is just killing me,
Keeping me a prisoner begging to be free.

I feel lost and abandoned,
As if I had died, no one would care.
So here I am, writing this letter,
Knowing that there is no love yet to try and spare.

I've cried and cried myself to sleep,
Wishing that I would never wake up the next day.
Yet the sunlight would seep through the blinds,
And then there was nothing left for me to say.

My parents had told me that I'd be alright.
That life would get better in the meantime.
But they never knew,
That I would end up sitting here,
With 50 pills committing this crime.

I would try to send them signs,
That I wasn't so alright.
But it was as if they had ignored them,
And now living with myself had become a great fright.

I have run away from home,
And tried to kill myself before.
I even use to cut myself,
Until I had no more room left on my wrists anymore.

But everyone thought,
I just wanted attention.
All I wanted was a simple hug,
And even my name to have a good mention.

But again,
I am the plain teen that no one cares about.
I am just one of the less,
And am not heard even when I scream or shout.

And when I told,
My old best friend.
She just told me i was psychotic,
And i had lost my best friend, till the end.

Paramore's song "Never Let This Go"
Is the only song I know?
That shares one of the same pains with me,
Until Three Days Grace's song "Pain" seems to show.

I've tried to be myself,
And follow my dreams.
But they are just stupid and worthless,
Just as it seems.

I just can't go on,
Don't try to talk me out of it.
Because all I'm going to end up in is a hospital,
Not getting better and eating cockroaches and shit!

You just don't know the pain I've felt.
It's gone on only too long.
I would tell you what's wrong,
But I can't just write it all in a simple poem or song.

And now i am crying
Saying to myself "I don't want to die!"
But I then realize and remember that i don't belong here,
And that I at least lived part of it and tried.

I got to make friends,
And even get a boyfriend.
But then they'd probably be
Better off without me in the end.

I can't even remember 
Where I went wrong.
It's just that
My story is unimportant and way too long.

I'm sorry if I've ever made you cry,
I'm sorry if I've ever made you want to die.

I'm sorry if I've treated you like shit,
This is why I'm putting an end to this.

So I'll say my prayers,
And say goodbye.
As I get ready to swallow them all,
So I can quickly forget before I cry.

But in the end,
I have no cry to even send.
Because no one would hear me anyway,
Since no one cared and watched me decay.

So here I lie,
And finally say that single bye.
As I pull the trigger,
And leave this world forever.

As I hang myself up high,
So the whole world can watch my disgrace as I die.
As I final swallow all of these pills,
I’m finally done with writing all of these wills.

But until I can finally let go,
I just wanted to let you know.
I bet you’d expect me to say:
“There was nothing you could do, Okay?”

Well, you’re wrong!
It was you who tortured me all day long!
You sat back and watched me, cry in silence,
But I’m guessing you’d never expect a death sentence.

Yet here I am…

Writing my
                   Suicide
                                Note…xxx

~Diana 
Posted: 2011-03-01 01:42:53 UTC

This poem has no votes yet. To vote, you must be logged in.
To leave comments, you must be logged in.