i can't let it happen again
i can already see it coming
and i know that i'm unready

you should try to be happy 
he says
i should make others happy
i said

do you want a girlfriend
or do you want me
do you disregard honesty 
to convince me

because you like me
or the idea of me
if you care
you'll wait
and then i'll share

my thoughts come less
and less
with every step with
every break
with every drop of blood

i need some time 
to clear my mind
and know that
it's really you i want