No one to cry to. 
Stomach twisting painfully,
Can't sit still for long.

Agony of soul
Alternates with stark numbness
I have no control.

Whatever it is
That dictates my emotion
Also rules my life.

But no more of this. 
I will force myself to feel.
Sure pain is better.

Clean, sharp iron blade.
The pain I control, my own.
Blood runs in lines.

I smile, defiant.
My secret rebellion.
None will ever know.

No one to cry to, 
They all think I'm fine. I am
Better than they know.