confusion

I am trying to write from my heart But the words seem unavailable I know what I want to write So many feelings that are in-containable Indescribable; a sense of love I don't want to understand this Why to me, you're complete perfection Though the definition of perfect remains unknown I'm feeling quite proud now To see you smile, to know your happiness Proud of you, for getting this far For getting further than me Jealousy and hurt; mixed There must be a dictionary definition for this You know I'm hurt and still You couldn't care less about it all Fading; all thoughts fading As I close my eyes for more than a while... Everything is silent now My heart has had enough