My Diary screaming out loud: Honest N hidden feelings from my so

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By Lisa Bedrossian

I'm afraid to live..I'm afraid to die..I'm to afraid to show my pain..I'm too afraid to let ya see me cry....I'm to afraid to remove my mask...It's no easy task....I'm afraid to end..I'm afraid to start..I'm afraid to show ya me..I'm afraid you'll break my heart....I'm afraid of every silent scream..I'm afraid everything that's perfect is nothin but a dream...I don't like myself at all...Too afraid to take that leap..I'm gunna fall... To be honest bein loved n cherised is wut i miss....I wunna be surronded by happiness and bliss...I'm surronded by the dark..I'm serching for the light...That everlasting spark... I'm ashamed of who i am...I hate me to the core...I don't thing I'll ever spread my wings and soar... I know inside i feel so broken...Everything i feel can never be spoken...I wonder wut happened to all my tears..I'm a slave to all to all my hidden fears...I wunna dance in the rain...I wunna hide all my pain...I wonder if God lisens when i pray...I wonder how i got so lost..I wonder how i went astray...I wonder will anyone see the tears i cry...I wunna jump in but i know i will drown..I hide behind a fake smile..So no can see my frown... To exsperience the rainbow...Ya gotta have the rain... To exsperience joy and laughter.. Ya gotta have the pain..When i lay my head to rest..I wounder if life is a impossible test...I often believe i have no worth...At times the only thing i feel inside is insecure ...I wish i could be calm and breath in and then let it all out.. When everything is out of control i just wunna scream and shout...When everything goes wrong..I try to I hope act strong... I hope god will be my guide...I hope he will keep his arms open wide...I hope He will carry me...I wonder if he'll ever set me free...I hope God will see me through..I hope he will stand by me in everything i do..I wish God understood that i'm hurting inside and i can't make it on my own...Why can't he see that i'm broken and aloneI need him to help me cope...Who will be there to hold my hand..I'm waiting for someone to give me hope...Every day is a struggle and everyday i get knocked down..I stand back up and lift my eyes to heaven Sitting up there is my king with the everylasting crown

Current vote: 9.0 / 5

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February 27, 2010 20:59Lisa Bedrossian

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February 28, 2010 04:28Lisa Bedrossian

PLEASE COMMENT AND VOTE ON MY POEM..i'D LIKE TO KNO WUT YA THINK OF MY POETRY..tHERE WILL BE MORE TO COME!!sO PLEASE COMMENT AND VOTE !!!

February 28, 2010 08:09jpaintedblue

I like this very much hun. Keep writing, its very theroputic

March 5, 2010 01:10StarStarlit

awwww this is so so sad-very beautiful tho-very and extremely well written-but very sad...always be happy, there is always a light in the end...learn to luv urself-and read my poem My Best Advice-hope this helps-ttylzzz x)

March 6, 2010 01:06StarStarlit

Hey-it's me again-I don't have a myspace tho-but I do have a facebook-my username is Diana Starlet-u can add me if u like-ttylz x) be happy :D