im so low im so low

Why do i keep on telling my self im soooo low How i wish this big black cloud would go is there only me who feels like this all around me people in bliss if i could only sleep every day completly wishing my life went away i dont want to smile and i dont want to laugh how can u tell me to stop beeing daft if you have never felt what i felt i dont want life just the feeling of death i feel so lazy and bord of my thought i need to change and be self tought and here comes that final day when that black cloud seems to go away and i smile and im confident and im back i love it when my life seems to be on track how that black cloud seems to come and go how i control it i just dont know from loving my life to wanting to die making a change i can only try i dread your opinion and what you think you dont understand doesnt that sink so from now just be here for me for good and bad and dont you flee I know how it feels in your head and in your heart i will always be here right from the start