My Love I give to Someone Special , by Eclipse of the Moon Subscribe to rss feed for Eclipse of the Moon

You stole my heart when you took my hand,

keep it safe now, do you understand?

My love is yours, True and Free.

Please say that you trust me.

I am yours and you are mine,

will you please be mine till the end of time?

As I count the days until I see you,

my feelings, you can be certain, are always true.

Those chains you lifted from my heart,

are now a curtain, hanging in the dark.

Never to touch me once again.

and I will Love you with all my Heart.

Posted: 2008-05-08 03:01:51 UTC

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2009-05-19 21:37:42...
Oooh I really like this, the only thing I would say is on the line "will you please be mine till the end of time?" I think you have too many syllables here, maybe you could try changing it a little bit as it doesn't fit in with the others?? Still apart from that it's really good! I love the use of rhyme and you've got some great imagery in there!!